Friday night gluttony

There are a few foods out there that are really only good for eating a few times a year, or better yet, just once every blue moon. For me, KFC is one of those places.

KFC never really made a permanent place on the dinner table when I was growing up. Usually it was a treat for summer picnics or a last resort when all other fast food joints in my small hometown were closed.

When I was really small I didn’t even really like KFC; I peeled the fried parts off, which was maybe one reason why I was such a skinny kid. Over time, however, I learned to love the original recipe and all its glory. Then in high school, KFC introduced popcorn chicken and soon we were eating lunch at KFC a few times a month. I was addicted.

At present day I don’t often pass by KFC restaurants, let alone patronize the place. Every time I do see one I tell myself that I need to go in for some of the Colonel’s tasty treats. I sure did miss those delicious biscuits and the popcorn chicken morsels.

Then one day while walking to breakfast at The Mission (probably one of the more wholesome breakfasts you can get) in North Park my roommate and I passed by a KFC. I laughed and said to her that maybe we should skip The Mission and just get a bucket of chicken. She looked at me with eyes full of glee and told me that she wouldn’t mind getting a bucket of chicken one night and watching movies at home. Challenge accepted.


This week a friend bought the Twilight DVD and offered to bring it over for Friday movie night. What a perfect time to sink our teeth (no pun intended, ok, well, maybe) into some juicy, crispy fried chicken. I was the last one to get off work, so I offered to pick up the food to make sure it was still warm for everyone.

I never thought of KFC as an intimidating restaurant, but it had been so long since I’d been to one that when I walked in I kind of looked like a deer in headlights. It’s not a very extensive menu, but what the heck should I order. 12-piece or 24-piece bucket? And what came in said bucket? I know mashed potatoes are a side, but are there other options? The menu wasn’t providing me answers to such questions.

“Can I take your order?” was being shouted at me (ok, so maybe shouted was an exaggeration, but like I said, intimidating!) from behind the register. Oh no. Ok, between 3 of us, a 6-piece bucket was probably enough. “And you want mashed potatoes with that, right?” the cashier told me. Ack, ummm, whatever you say KFC master. But I knew I wanted more than the 3 biscuits that came with the meal-deal. “What kind of biscuit sides do you offer?” I asked timidly. “It comes with biscuits already.” She responded. “Don’t look at me like that, I just want some more damn biscuits, alright.” I only thought that to myself and ordered a side of 2 more biscuits (even though I truly wanted more). “Will that be for here or to go?” the evil cashier asked. Ummm, lady, did you not see me walk in alone. Do you really think I’m going to down 6 pieces of chicken, 5 biscuits and some mashed potatoes by myself?

I finally got my bucket and headed home. Upon opening the door to my apartment I was hit with an increasingly typical apartment smell of newly baked cupcakes. What the?! I shout for the girls and tell them that the fried goodness has arrived and turn the corner to the kitchen to see my roommate pulling out a tray of cupcakes – Sprinkles cupcakes nonetheless. Oh geeze, as if the night needed to be any more unhealthy…but then we started watching Twilight. Enough said.